All He Ever Desired (Kowalski Family, #5)

“You know, this is really awkward,” Paige said, staring down at her plate. “I want to ask you if you’re going to break it off with him, but I just remembered he’s my brother-in-law now, so maybe I don’t want to know.”


“I should,” Lauren said, her heart breaking a little. “I should end it before we get any more involved or he wears himself out or Nick gets any more attached to him. He should find somebody free to step into his life, who wants to give him a horde of kids, which is a whole ’nother can of worms I haven’t mentioned. So, yes, I should break it off with him.”

“But?” This time they said it in unison.

“I can’t. When I’m with him, I can’t imagine not being with him, no matter how hard it gets. There’s no way I could tell him to leave and not come back. I just have to roll with it, I guess.”

*

Ryan would have preferred to meet Dean in a bar somewhere and maybe buy him a beer, but Whitford didn’t have a bar. Plus the guy was working, so he had to settle for a soda at the picnic table in the backyard of the house he was painting.

“Thanks for agreeing to talk to me,” was what Ryan opened with, but he wasn’t really sure where to go from there.

“Is there a problem with Nick?”

“No. Nick’s doing great. It’s about Lauren, actually.”

Dean gave a dry laugh. “Since I managed to end our marriage so badly that it took a year to rebuild my relationship with my son, I’m probably not the guy to give you advice about her.”

“I guess it’s about Nick, too.” He took a sip of the soda, then decided for direct. “I want to marry Lauren.”

“Ah.” Dean picked at the edge of the wooden table. “So you want to take my son to Massachusetts.”

“That’s part of marrying Lauren, yes.”

“What does Lauren say about it?”

“I haven’t actually asked her yet.”

“What?” Dean shook his head. “You haven’t talked to her about it, but you’re talking to me about it? That’s not going to make her happy.”

Ryan wasn’t sure he could explain why he’d felt compelled to come here. “He’s your son. I guess I felt a need to...do it right this time. Look you in the eye, totally square, and tell you I want Nick to be my stepson and move to Brookline with his mother and me.”

“And what if I tell you to go screw yourself? I’ve got a custody agreement and you can’t take him out of the state of Maine without my permission. Might even be the county, actually. I’d have to find the paperwork. Would you still ask Lauren to marry you?”

“Yeah.” He didn’t even have to think about that. “But at least we’d know up front we’re going to have problems, and I’d remind you both that, at sixteen, if we all walk into a courtroom, Nick’s going to get to make that decision for himself.”

“And you think he’d choose you?”

“I don’t know, but it’s not about me. He’d be choosing between you and his mother and the only thing I know for sure is that it would tear him up inside. I’m hoping it doesn’t come to that.”

Dean nodded. “Jody and I have talked about this some. Doesn’t take a genius to see you and Lauren have been getting serious.”

“Since I just figured out how serious myself recently, it’s not very comforting everybody could see it but me.”

“Nick’s gotten into some trouble here.”

Ryan wasn’t sure where that left turn in the conversation came from. “Nothing bad, though. And, to be fair, there’s a good chance he’ll get in trouble anywhere. He’s sixteen.”

“I guess the difference is, when he grows out of it, there’s still not much for him in Whitford. Not even crap for jobs around here, whether he goes to college or not. Maybe he could take over the hardware store someday, but you know as well as I do that place is always on the brink. One of those box stores opens within thirty miles and it’s gone.” He swirled the soda around in his can. “You probably got some good schools down there.”

Ryan nodded. “A lot of opportunities for him, too, no matter what field he wants to go into.”

“See, there’s the difference. You talk about fields, like real careers. Around here, we just hope we can find jobs that pay the bills. He’ll have a better future down there.”

“He’ll have more doors open to him, but he needs the work ethic and the integrity to make the most of those opportunities. You and Lauren already gave him that, no matter where he lives.”

Dean was quiet for a few minutes, lost in thought, and Ryan let him be. Brookline wasn’t that far away, but a nine-hour round-trip meant the ability to easily see each other on a whim would be gone.

“I can’t make that drive every weekend,” Dean said, as though he’d been reading his mind.

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