Bared to You

I blew steam off the top of my mug and took a tentative sip. "I f*cked his brains out in his limo and he turned arctic afterward."

Cary watched me with those worldly emerald eyes, eyes that had seen more than anyone should be subjected to. "Rocked his world, did you?"

"Yeah, I did." And I got riled up just thinking about it. We'd connected. I knew it. I'd wanted him more than anything last night, and today I wanted nothing to do with him ever again. "It was intense. The best sexual experience of my life, and he was right there with me. I know he was. First time he'd ever made it in a car, and he was kind of resistant at first, but then I got him so hot for it he couldn't say no."

"Really? Never?" He ran a hand over his morning stubble. "Most guys scratch car banging off their f*ck list in high school. In fact, I can't think of anyone who didn't, except for the nerds and fuglies, and he's neither."

I shrugged. "I guess car banging makes me a slut."

Cary grew very still. "Is that what he said?"

"No. He didn't say shit. I got that from his 'friend,' Magdalene. You know that chick in most of the photos you printed off the Internet? She decided to sharpen her claws with a little catty girl chat in the bathroom."

"The bitch is jealous."

"Sexual frustration. She can't f*ck him, because apparently girls who f*ck him go into the discard pile."

"Did he say that?" Again, fury laced his quiet question.

"Not in so many words. He said he doesn't sleep with his female friends. He's got issues with women wanting more than a good time in the sack, so he keeps the women he bangs and the women he hangs out with in two separate camps." I took another sip of my coffee. "I warned him that sort of setup wasn't going to work for me and he said he'd make some adjustments, but I guess he's one of those guys who'll say whatever's necessary to get what he wants."

"Or else you have him running scared."

I glared. "Don't make excuses for him. Whose side are you on, anyway?"

"Yours, baby girl." He reached out and patted my knee. "Always yours."

I wrapped my hand around his muscular forearm and stroked my fingers gently along the underside in silent gratitude. I couldn't feel the multitude of fine white scars from cutting that marred his skin, but I never forgot they were there. I was thankful every day that he was alive, healthy, and a vital part of my life. "How'd your night go?"

"I can't complain." His eyes took on a mischievous glint. "I shagged that busty blonde in a maintenance closet. Her tits were real."

"Well, then." I smiled. "You made her night, I'm sure."

"I try." He picked up the phone receiver and winked at me. "What kind of delivery do you want? Subs? Chinese? Indian?"

"I'm not hungry."

"You're always hungry. If you don't pick something, I'll cook and you'll have to eat that."

I lifted my hand in surrender. "Okay, okay. You pick."

I got to work twenty minutes early on Monday, figuring I'd skip running into Gideon. When I reached my desk without incident, I felt such relief that I knew I was in serious trouble where he was concerned. My moods were shifting all over the place.

Mark arrived in high spirits, still floating from his major successes of the week before, and we dug right into work. I'd done some vodka market comparisons on Sunday and he was kind enough to go over those with me and listen to my impressions. Mark was also assigned the account for a new e-reader manufacturer, so we began the initial work on that.

With such a busy morning, time flew swiftly and I didn't have time to think about my personal life. I was really grateful for that. Then I answered the phone and heard Gideon on the line. I wasn't prepared.

"How's your Monday been so far?" he asked, his voice sending a shiver of awareness through me.

"Hectic." I glanced at the clock and was startled to see it was twenty minutes to noon.

"Good." There was a pause. "I tried calling you yesterday. I left a couple messages. I wanted to hear your voice."

My eyes closed on a deep breath. It had taken every bit of my willpower to make it through the day without listening to the voice mail. I'd even enlisted Cary in the cause, telling him to restrain me forcibly if it looked like I might succumb to the urge. "I did the hermit thing and worked a little."

"Did you get the flowers I sent?"

"Yes. They're lovely. Thank you."

"They reminded me of your dress."

What the hell was he doing? I was beginning to think he had multiple personality disorder. "Some women might say that's romantic."

"I only care what you say." His chair creaked as if he'd pushed to his feet. "I thought about stopping by...I wanted to."

I sighed, surrendering to my confusion. "I'm glad you didn't."

There was another long pause. "I deserved that."

"I didn't say it to be a bitch. It's just the truth."

"I know. Listen...I arranged for lunch up here in my office so we don't waste any of the hour leaving and getting back."

After his parting, I'll call you, I'd wondered if he would want to get together again after he settled down from whatever trip he'd been on. It was a possibility I'd been dreading since Saturday night, aware that I needed to cut him off, but feeling strung out from the desire to be with him. I wanted to experience again that pure, perfect moment of intimacy we'd shared.

But I couldn't justify that one moment against all the other moments when he made me feel like crap.

"Gideon, we don't have any reason to have lunch together. We hashed things out Friday night, and we...took care of business Saturday. Let's just leave it at that."

"Eva." His voice turned gruff. "I know I f*cked up. Let me explain."

"You don't have to. It's okay."

"It's not. I need to see you."

"I don't want - "

"We can do this the easy way, Eva. Or you can make it difficult." His tone took on a hard edge that made my pulse quicken. "Either way, you'll hear me out."

I closed my eyes, understanding that I wasn't lucky enough to get away with a quick good-bye phone chat. "Fine. I'll come up."

"Thank you." He exhaled audibly. "I can't wait to see you."

I returned the receiver to its cradle and stared at the photos on my desk, trying to formulate what I needed to say and steeling myself for the impact of seeing Gideon again. The ferocity of my physical response to him was impossible to control. Somehow I'd have to get past it and take care of business. Later, I'd think about having to see him in the building over the days, weeks, and months ahead. For the moment, I just had to focus on making it through lunch.

Yielding to the inevitable, I got back to work comparing the visual impact of some blow-in card samples.

"Eva."

I jumped and spun around in my chair, startled to find Gideon standing beside my cubicle. The sight of him blew me away, as usual, and my heart stuttered in my chest. A quick glance at the clock proved that a quarter hour had passed in no time at all.

"Gid - Mr. Cross. You didn't have to come down here."

His face was calm and impassive, but his eyes were stormy and hot. "Ready?"

I opened my drawer and pulled out my purse, taking the opportunity to suck in a deep, shaky breath. He smelled phenomenal and looked even better.

"Mr. Cross." Mark's voice. "It's great to see you. Is there something - ?"

"I'm here for Eva. We have a lunch date."

I straightened in time to see Mark's brows shoot up. He recovered quickly, his face smoothing into its usual good-natured handsomeness.

"I'll be back at one," I assured him.

"See you then. Enjoy your lunch."

Gideon put his hand at the small of my back and steered me out to the elevators, garnering raised brows from Megumi when we passed reception. I shifted restlessly as he hit the call button for the elevator, wishing I could've made it through the day without seeing the man whose touch I craved like a drug.

He faced me as we waited for the car, running his fingertips down the sleeve of my satin blouse. "Every time I close my eyes, I see you in that red dress. I hear the sounds you make when you're turned on. I feel you sliding over my cock, squeezing me like a fist, making me come so hard it hurts."

"Don't." I looked away, unable to bear the intimate way he was looking at me.

"I can't help it."

The arrival of the elevator was a relief. He caught my hand and pulled me inside. After he put his key in the panel, he tugged me closer. "I'm going to kiss you, Eva."

"I don't - "

He pulled me into him and sealed his mouth over mine. I resisted as long as I could; then I melted at the feel of his tongue stroking slow and sweet over mine. I'd wanted his kiss since we'd had sex. I wanted the reassurance that he valued what we'd shared, that it meant something to him as it had to me.

I was left bereft once again when he pulled away.

"Come on." He pulled the key out as the door opened.

Gideon's redheaded receptionist said nothing this time, although she eyed me strangely. In contrast, Gideon's secretary, Scott, stood when we approached and greeted me pleasantly by name.

"Good afternoon, Miss Tramell."

"Hi, Scott."

Gideon gave him a curt nod. "Hold my calls."

"Yes, of course."

I entered Gideon's expansive office, my gaze drifting to the sofa where he'd first touched me intimately.

Lunch was arranged on the bar - two plates covered in metal salvers.

"Can I take your purse?" he asked.

I looked at him, saw he'd taken off his jacket and slung it over his arm. He stood there in his tailored slacks and vest, his shirt and tie both a pristine white, his hair dark and thick around his breathtaking face, his eyes a wild and dazzling blue. In a word, he amazed me. I couldn't believe I'd made love to such a gorgeous man.

But then, it hadn't meant the same thing to him.

"Eva?"

"You're beautiful, Gideon." The words fell out of my mouth without conscious thought.

His brows lifted; then a softness came into his eyes. "I'm glad you like what you see."

I handed him my purse and moved away, needing the space. He hung his coat and my purse on the coatrack, then moved to the bar.

I crossed my arms. "Let's just get this over with. I don't want to see you anymore."

Gideon shoved a hand through his hair and exhaled harshly. "You don't mean that."

I was suddenly very tired, exhausted from fighting with myself over him. "I really do. You and me...it was a mistake."

His jaw tightened. "It wasn't. The way I handled it afterward was the mistake."

I stared at him, startled by the fierceness of his denial. "I wasn't talking about the sex, Gideon. I'm talking about my agreeing to this crazy strangers-with-benefits deal between us. I knew it was all wrong from the beginning. I should've listened to my instincts."

"Do you want to be with me, Eva?"

"No. That's what - "

"Not like we discussed at the bar. More than that."

My heart started to pound. "What are you talking about?"

"Everything." He left the bar and came closer. "I want to be with you."

"You didn't seem like you did Saturday." My arms tightened around my middle.

"I was...reeling."

"So? I was, too."

His hands went to his hips. Then his arms crossed like mine. "Christ, Eva."

I watched him squirm and felt a flare of hope. "If that's all you've got, we're done."

"The hell we are."

"We've already hit a dead end if you're going to take a head trip every time we have sex."

He visibly struggled with what to say. "I'm used to having control. I need it. And you blew it all to hell in the limousine. I didn't handle that well."

"Ya think?"

"Eva." He approached. "I've never experienced anything like that. I didn't think it was possible for me to. Now that I have...I've got to have it. I've got to have you."

"It's just sex, Gideon. Super awesome sex, but that can seriously screw with your head when the two people doing it aren't good for each other."

"Bullshit. I've admitted I f*cked up. I can't change what happened, but I can sure as shit get pissed that you want to cut me off because of it. You laid out your rules and I adjusted to accommodate them, but you won't make even a tiny adjustment for me. You have to meet me halfway." His face was hard with frustration. "At least give me a damn inch."

I stared at him, trying to figure out what he was doing and where this was going. "What do you want, Gideon?" I asked softly.

He caught me to him and cupped my cheek in one hand. "I want to keep feeling the way I feel when I'm with you. Just tell me what I have to do. And give me some room to screw up. I've never done this before. There's a learning curve."

I placed my palm over his heart and felt its pounding rhythm. He was anxious and passionate, and that had me on edge. How was I supposed to respond? Did I go with my gut or my common sense? "Done what before?"

"Whatever it takes to spend as much time with you as possible. In and out of bed."

The rush of delight that swept through me was ridiculously powerful. "Do you understand how much work and time a relationship between us is going to take, Gideon? I'm wiped out already. Plus I'm still working on some personal stuff, and I have my new job...my crazy mother..."

My fingers covered his mouth before he could open it. "But you're worth it, and I want you bad enough. So I guess I don't have a choice, do I?"

"Eva. Damn you." Gideon lifted me, hitching one arm beneath my rear to urge me to wrap my legs around his waist. He kissed me hard on the mouth and nuzzled his nose against mine. "We'll figure it out."

"You say that as if it'll be easy." I knew I was high-maintenance and he was obviously going to be the same.

"Easy's boring." He carried me over to the bar and set me down on a barstool. He pulled the dome off my place setting and revealed a massive cheeseburger and fries. The meal was still warm, thanks to a heated granite slab beneath the plate.

"Yum," I murmured, becoming aware of how hungry I was. Now that we'd talked, my appetite had returned full force.

He snapped open my napkin and laid it over my lap with a squeeze to my knee; then he took the seat beside me. "So, how do we do this?"

"Well, you pick it up with your hands and put it in your mouth."

He shot me a wry look that made me smile. It felt good to smile. It felt good to be with him. It usually did...for a little while. I took a bite of my burger, moaning when I got a full hit of its flavor. It was a traditional cheeseburger, but the taste was divine.

"Good, right?" he asked.

"Very good. In fact, a guy who knows about burgers this good might be worth keeping to myself." I wiped my mouth and hands. "How resistant are you to exclusivity?"

As he set his burger down, there was an eerie stillness to him. I couldn't begin to guess what he was thinking. "I assumed that was implied in our arrangement. But to avoid any doubts, I'll be clear and say there won't be any other men for you, Eva."

A shiver moved through me at the blunt finality in his tone and the iciness of his gaze. I knew he had a dark side; I'd learned long ago how to spot and avoid men who had dangerous shadows in their eyes. But the familiar alarm bells didn't ring around Gideon as they maybe should have. "But women are okay?" I asked to lighten the mood.

His brows rose. "I know your roommate is bisexual. Are you?"

"Would that bother you?"

"Sharing you would bother me. It's not an option. Your body belongs to me, Eva."

"And yours belongs to me? Exclusively?"

His gaze turned hot. "Yes, and I expect you to take frequent and excessive advantage of it."

Well, then..."But you've seen me naked," I teased, my voice husky. "You know what you're getting. I don't. I love what I've seen of your body so far, but that hasn't been a whole lot."

"We can rectify that now."

The thought of him stripping for me made me squirm in my seat. He noticed and his mouth curved wickedly.

"You'd better not," I said regretfully. "I was late getting back on Friday."

"Tonight, then."