“No.”
“What if Koti loves someone else now?” The burn in my chest scattered, singeing every part of me as Ella pulled an envelope out of her purse. Inside was a small square picture of Koti. Pain radiated through me as I fixated on the perfection of her face. Had she moved on? Everything inside me ached at the thought and at the same time, it was exactly what I’d asked her to do. The picture had been taken a month ago and if her smile was any indication of her progress, she was in far better shape than me.
“She writes to me all the time. She loves me. She loves you. This is the good love you said you wanted me to know about. The kind you and Mom didn’t have. Dad, listen to me.”
I choked on the lump in my throat. “I’m listening, baby. I promise.”
“Good.” Tears sprung up as her passion flew out of her mouth. “I won’t let you keep me from that love.”
“I understand, but this is different.”
“No. I’m almost a woman!” She seemed more intent than ever on making that clear.
“There are plenty of things you aren’t old enough for.”
She rolled her eyes dramatically. “Dad. Go to her before it’s too late.”
“I can’t leave you. I won’t.”
“I’m leaving you, Dad!”
My head snapped up as she lifted her hands. I’m leaving you. I’m sorry. It’s time for you to find your new life.
I lifted my hands. You are my life.
“No,” she spoke again. “Koti too.”
Shocked at her admission and the weight of what she was saying, I couldn’t help the build of emotion that swam in my eyes. At the sight of it, Ella flew into my arms and spoke directly into my ear. “We can both be happy. I promise. I know you love me. Go be with her. She still loves you too. I know it.”
Praying I could whisper back, just once, to my little girl she pulled away as we both righted ourselves. I wiped my face of more tears.
You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I want you to know that.
“I know,” she said plainly.
I laughed at that as she took her seat and spoke again. “Do whatever the hell you have to do to make yourself happy. We only get one life, Daddy.”
A small group of women walked by staring wide-eyed in our direction before they spoke up to encourage her.
“Damn right, baby!”
“You tell him, honey!”
I raised a brow in an attempt to hide my smirk. “Where did you get that?”
She signed back.
An asshole I’m proud of.
One week later…
I pulled into the driveway and took a deep breath as I studied the identical houses. So much time had passed, yet the sight remained as much the same as the feeling in my chest. I’d abandoned her here months ago, and the last time I’d spoken to her, I’d given her no reason to wait for me. No reason to believe I would ever return. Exiting the cab of the truck, I glanced around the darkening sky. Koti always made it home by sunset, and I was losing my window by screwing around. All week I’d run in circles in an attempt to settle things in the States, so I didn’t have to leave her again in the near future. If by some miracle she took me back, if I had any place at all in her life, I was going to make damn sure I was able to be there. It took me a majority of the time to find someone to cover my class load, the rest I spent subletting my apartment. If Koti didn’t take me back, I would be a gypsy. That fear had me on the sand making headway toward her house before I could even begin to think about the right words. I’d phoned her, but her number no longer worked, which only had me scrambling faster to get to her. At Ease Property was on hiatus according to the answering service and the number I had for Jasmine had long since been erased from my phone from her one time calling me. I was at a dead end in reaching her and had only one option.
I breached the clearing of the alley only to be disappointed by the sight of the ocean without her standing in front of it. The loud clatter of wood on her porch had me jumping out of my reverie.
“Can I help you?”
I scoured the guy questioning me from head to toe. Tall, dark, built, and decent looking. Instantly, I hated him.
“I’m looking for Koti Vaughn.”
“She’s not here.”
Rage boiled through my veins as he gave me a subtle smirk. I wasn’t in the mood for bullshit and it seemed the opposite for him. He positioned a large piece of wood over one of her windows and began nailing it in.
“Can I ask what in the hell you are doing?”
“Uh,” he said with a furrowed brow. “I guess you could say I’m paying penance.
“Are you a friend of Koti’s?” I asked, my tone full of accusation.
“Something like that,” he said, giving me another disgusting fucking grin.
“In case it isn’t apparent, I’m not in the mood for this. Where is she and what are you to her?”
The guy smiled showing me every single one of his white teeth. “I’ve never met Koti man, chill out.”
“Then can I ask why you’re on her porch boarding up her house?”
“A favor for her friend, Jasmine,” he replied. “It’s a long story, but made short she asked me to board up this house and the one over before the storm comes.”
“Storm?”
“Big cell, hurricane headed straight for the islands. I don’t know when you got here man, but you better turn around and get out fast. It’s going to start tomorrow.”
“I’ve been busy all week, haven’t bothered to look at the news.”
“Did you miss every TV screen on the way here?”
“Shit,” I said, wiping my face.
“It’s everywhere.”
“Can you give me Jasmine’s number?”
“No,” he said. “But maybe she’ll pick up if I call her.”
“Maybe?”
“Like I said, long story.”
I rolled up my sleeves and picked up some of the boards. “That’s my parents’ place next door. I’ll get this done and come back and give you a hand.”
“Thanks, man, I appreciate it. Tell you what, I have a jet leaving at six. You help me out here, and I’ll make sure you get out of here in one piece.”
“Where’s Jasmine?”
“Iowa.”
“Iowa?” I grinned. She was with Julian.
“Want to tell me what that grin is about, brother? I’ve been begging for crumbs for the last few months.”
“I think it’s best that I don’t tell you for now.”
“Fair enough.” He swung the hammer as I got to work boarding up my parents’ house. Once I finished, I helped to finish boarding up Koti’s place. Every nail planted felt like more of what I didn’t want. I choked down the emotion of being on the island without her as I did everything I could to board her house up. Wherever she was, I was sure she was terrified.
When we were finished, the guy held out his hand. “I’m Steven.”
“Ian,” I offered, shaking his hand.
“I’m not sure this is going to help these houses, but let’s get the hell out of here.”
“I’m not leaving without Koti.”
“She’s not here in St. Thomas. Sorry, I thought you understood me.”
“And you don’t know where she is?”
“Nope. Let’s get on the plane and we can give Jasmine a call.”
“Sounds good.”
Two hours later, I was seated on a luxury jet when Steven put a cell phone in my hand.
“Hello?”
“You stupid ass men. I swear to God, I’m glad you found Steven, you two idiots deserve each other. If I was there, I would rip your damned balls off. You ASSHOLE!”
Steven chuckled across from me in his seat. “She’s a live one.”
I covered the mouthpiece. “I can see why you’re so smitten.”
“I’m so fucked,” he muttered, sinking back in his seat before he closed his eyes.
“It’s good to talk to you too, Jasmine. I’ve missed you as well.”
“Your ‘I’m a gentleman’ crap won’t work with me, and you damn well know it.” I heard a muffled, “Is that Ian? Let me talk to him.”
I would know Julian’s voice anywhere and heard Jasmine’s response to his request in the form of a painful grunt and a relenting, “Okay, baby, okay no need to get all batshit. Jeez!”