Caleb was waiting for her at the top of the steps with a cup of coffee in his hand. “Hello.” He handed her the cup. “I thought you’d be back. You were far too quiet when I came back after talking to Lisa. But then Jock called and said he was coming onto the airport grounds, and I knew you wouldn’t be happy until you knew for sure that Lisa was going to be all right.”
She took a drink of the coffee. “You’re right. I had to know.” She smiled. “So I had to ask her. That’s why I went down to the tarmac with her. It was far more reassuring coming from her than it would have been from you.”
He went still. “Then why did you come back?”
“Unfinished business.” She set her cup down on the table beside the door. “We have so much unfinished business, Caleb.” She moistened her lips. “And I’m going to choose to finish it tonight, if you’re willing.” She began to unbutton her blouse. “Choices, Caleb. How many times have you told me that I was afraid of you, that otherwise I’d—”
“What is this?” He was very still, his eyes on her fingers moving on the buttons. “Why now? What are you doing?”
“You didn’t let me finish.” She shrugged, her fingers dropping away from the open shirt. “I was afraid of you. I always felt too much whenever I was around you. You played all those mind games with me and I never knew where I was at.” She met his eyes. “Or where you were going to take me. I still don’t. But I’m choosing to take a chance on you.”
“Why?”
“Because you mean something to me. I don’t know what it is yet, but I get angry when I think of what you went through all those years ago. I’m mad at myself that I might have treated you like that, too, because you made me feel—”
“Don’t be foolish. You never treated me like them,” he said harshly. “You don’t know anything about what I—”
“No, I don’t. And I probably won’t ever know. But I know I’ll never judge you because of fear or ignorance again.”
“No, you’d rather melt all over me with that crappy sympathy,” he said through set teeth. “I told you I didn’t want or need it. I’ve never needed it. My terms, Jane. Always, my terms. So get the hell out of here.”
“Why? Because you’ll only come after me again.” She took a step toward him. “Or I’ll come after you. Because it’s not finished.”
“No. But then it will be on my terms. It won’t be because you think I saved your damn life and—”
“Which you did.”
“Or because you listened to all that crap from Lisa about how we grew up.”
“Not crap. But in the end, the main effect of that was that it held up a mirror to me.”
His lips twisted. “And judging by the fact that you’re taking off your clothes, you’re letting that mirror reflect a person dripping with pity who’s trying to save me from myself with sex.” He added mockingly, “Not that I don’t approve of the means. It’s my very favorite. It’s just in this case, I resent the implication that I—”
“Shut up.” Her hands clenched into fists at her sides. “Don’t you know how hard this is for me? I’m trying to be honest with you because I believe it’s the only chance we have. But truth makes me incredibly vulnerable with someone like you.” She moistened her lips. “But there’s really no one like you, is there? You developed that Persuasion as a protective device, but you became too good at it. For heaven’s sake, when you were only a kid, you found a way to dominate Teresa Romano. The only way she thought she could regain control was to kill you.”
“Extreme example, Jane.”
“Is it? It’s one of the things I have to learn about you. I want to learn, Caleb. I don’t think you want me to be anyone but who I am, but I could be wrong.” She stared him in the eye. “Am I?”
He was silent. “God no,” he finally said roughly. “I have more than enough to deal with in you as you are.”
“Then deal with me.” She shrugged out of her shirt and let it drop to the floor. “But no hallucinations about rose gardens or Cira and her Antonio or any of the other tricks you can pull out of your hat. All very fascinating and addictive.” She was walking toward him. “But I want it to be honest, Caleb. Please. No Persuasion.”
He let her come within a foot of him before he spoke. “You made the choice. This may not be what you want from me. Too bad. I’m not going to let you go.”
She took another step. “Honesty is all I want from you, Caleb.”
He gazed at her for an instant and then slowly nodded. “No hallucinations, no game playing.” He was smiling at her. “This time. But I’m not going to be able to hold off forever. I want you addicted.” He was shrugging out of his clothes. “I want you to wake in the middle of the night burning. I want you to reach out for me in the dark and feel empty if I’m not there. I want you to look at me across a room and feel your stomach clench because you want to take me inside you.” He was quickly stripping off her clothes. “Too long, Jane. We’ve waited too long.”
Yes, we have, she thought dazedly. And she couldn’t wait any longer. She could feel the warmth his naked body was emitting. She tried to step closer to him.
“No.” He was lifting her, sliding her legs around his hips. “Let me.…” He was sitting down on the couch, positioning her, while his lips moved across her breasts, biting and licking.
She inhaled sharply as he took her nipple in his teeth and shook it. More. She needed more. She tried to move closer.
“No.”
“Don’t tell me no. I need it. Don’t try to control me.”
He stopped and then chuckled. “Control can be good in this position.” He looked her in the eyes. “But have it your way.”
He was suddenly inside her.
But still moving excruciatingly slowly, filling her, teasing her.
She couldn’t breathe. She was dizzy, shaking.
Then she was burning, throbbing, her skin flushed, her whole body racked with sensation.
“I could go on like this.” His voice was suddenly thick, tense. “But it will kill me.”
“That can’t happen.” Her nails dug into his shoulders. “I won’t—allow it.”
“Thank God.” He lifted her and then plunged deep.
She cried out.
Wildness.
Fullness.
Deeper.
She heard him muttering in her ear, but she couldn’t make out the words.
Fast.
Fierce.
Lifting.
Moving.
Strong. He was so strong.…
He was looking down at her, his face flushed, his lips beautifully sensual. “I … need—” He broke off. “Don’t look now, but that control you were so afraid of is about to … shatter.” His head lowered until their lips were only a breath apart. “With your permission…”
She couldn’t answer. She lunged upward, taking his mouth, taking anything and everything he was offering.
Madness.
Wildness.
Deeper.
She was gasping.
Sensuality.
Darkness.
Flame.
Caleb!
She desperately held on to him as wave after wave of pleasure rocked through her. She kept her eyes closed because opening them might mean it was over.
Darkness.
The feel of his body against her.
The sound of his heart beneath her ear.
But he was leaving her.…
Then she felt herself being shifted to lie on the leather couch and the fur throw being draped over her body. “I don’t want that throw.” She opened her eyes and saw him sitting on the couch beside her. “Poor substitute, Caleb.”
“I’m glad you think so. I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” He was smiling down at her. “But I thought it was wise to give you a break. You’re still very tentative about me. And I don’t know if I can obey your rules next time.” He bent down and kissed her breast. “But I did pretty well, didn’t I?”
“You could say that.” Even now she could feel her breasts tighten and start to tingle as he touched them. “I think. I was a little dizzy and not noticing much. But it felt as if you were being honest with me. That was what was important.”
He sighed. “Then I have to admit I wasn’t entirely honest.” His dark eyes were dancing with mischief. “No heavy stuff. No hallucinations or changing perceptions. I just cleared the way so that you’d feel everything more intensely.”
“Caleb.”