“When I saw Riley today, heard how he tried to save that girl, and thought of all he’s been through, I realized that kid is stronger than I am, and it humbled me.” He needed to do this, to move on so he could help Riley move on. Izzy and Riley deserved his entire self, instead of only a portion because the other portion was imprisoned by a past he’d never come to terms with. And most of all, he needed to purge the guilt he’d felt all these years.
“He’s stronger than both of us, Coop, because any tough times we’ve lived through, he’s seen in spades.”
Cooper nodded slowly as he turned to her. Nothing but concern and affection shone in her eyes. Her beautiful mouth was drawn in a tight line of worry. “It’s time to look ahead, instead of behind, to heal the scars of the past, and move onto a better future.”
“Yes, it’s time.” She rubbed his arm, and her touch comforted him, warming him a little in this cold, soulless place.
“That’s why I came here. To say goodbye, once and for all.” And to stop being a coward, to be the brave man Riley and Izzy deserved.
“What happened here, Coop?” Izzy grabbed his hand. Hers was warm and dry, while his was cold and clammy.
He stayed silent for a long while, gathering the nerve to put into words a summer he’d locked away in his mind, just as he’d been locked away all those years ago.
“My siblings and I used to love this place. My aunt was childless and had us visit every summer. When Julie turned thirteen, and I was nine, our aunt married a guy we all adored. He was a city cop, an upstanding guy, and a good provider. Or so we thought. We were wrong. Eventually I came to hate Seattle because of him.”
Izzy kept quiet, letting him talk at his own pace. He didn’t need prompting. It was as if once he started, he couldn’t stop, despite how hard it was for him. She leaned into his solid body, giving him the strength he didn’t have on his own.
“The first summer we loved our new uncle. He was such a great guy, and he took us all sorts of places. The next summer, we knew as soon as we arrived that things had changed. Drastically. He’d turned into someone else, and my aunt tiptoed around him as if she were scared to death. He worked graveyard so he was home while she was at work. Instead of taking us fun places, he kept us inside with all the drapes shut. In fact, he hated us boys and liked my sister too much. He did weird things, like was really friendly with my sister. I didn’t understand at the time. But it got worse. He started locking my brother and me into a large steamer trunk during the day, sometimes for so long that we’d end up peeing our pants in there, then he’d spank us for doing so. And I mean spank. While we were locked in the trunk, we could hear our sister begging him to leave her alone. He swore he’d kill us all if we told anyone.”
Cooper sucked in a breath. “We just wanted to go home and never come back, but we loved our aunt and were afraid of what he’d do to her as well as us if we said anything. If she suspected what was going on, she never said. Not once. She didn’t seem to know how to get out of the situation. He was a cop, and he had power she didn’t have.” Cooper paused and buried his face in Izzy’s shoulder, drawing in deep, calming breaths while she rubbed his back.
“Oh, Cooper, I’m so sorry. So very sorry.” She held him to her, and he never wanted to leave her calming presence. He felt the love flowing from her to him and knew as he knew how to put a puck on the top shelf that she would forever be the best thing that ever happened to him.
Finally, Cooper drew back and the words started again, as if he couldn’t contain them. Cooper avoided looking in her eyes. If he looked now, he’d lose it, and he couldn’t, not yet. Not until he’d told her everything.
“One night he threatened all of us with a gun, shot it into the ceiling, and the neighbors called the police. Of course, a couple of his buddies answered the call and asked us a few questions. My sister spilled her guts, crying and wailing. My brother and I were so afraid of all of them that we said everything was fine. So they left, assuming my sister was being a dramatic teenager. But my aunt, she knew, I know she did. She never said a word, but the next day, we were on the plane flying home. Within twenty-four hours, she was dead.”
Izzy stared at him, horrified. “He killed her?”
“I’m positive he did, but it was ruled an accident. He claimed he’d been about to clean his gun and it misfired or some dumbshit excuse. We never said a word because we were so afraid he’d hunt us down and kill us and our parents.”
“So your sister blames you for not speaking up that night?” Izzy wrapped her arms around his waist, holding him.
“My sister blames everyone in her life—me, my brother, our parents. Hell, she blames Riley for being born. I see that now. I feel as if the sister I knew died in this house that summer.”
“It wasn’t your fault. You were just a kid dealing with abuse and fear the best way you knew how.”
“My sister never recovered from that summer. She’d been a happy, energetic teenager, loving, great student, and full of life. After that she turned sullen and angry, started hanging with the wrong crowd and went into self-destruct mode. Everything went downhill from there.”
“I’m sorry, Cooper, so very sorry. Whatever happened to your uncle? Is he still around?”
“No, he was shot by an armed robber about ten years ago. I’m glad or I’d have tracked him down and killed him with my bare hands.”
Izzy nodded grimly. “That bastard wasn’t worth going to jail.”
“No, he wasn’t, which is the only thing that held me back.”
“Do your parents know about all this?” Izzy asked.
“No, my mom has Crohn’s, and she would suffer a relapse if she knew the truth. I don’t know if she could handle it. Telling her won’t make the past go away.” Cooper glanced around the room one last time and turned to Izzy. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Let’s do.”
They headed back to the hospital and Riley.
“Cooper,” Izzy said before they got out of the car, “I want you to know that it meant a lot to me that you shared your pain with me today.”