"Pax has been sweet to Lula."
"Of course he has. He likes kids. Relates to them because of his low IQ." My frown makes her laugh. "Don't be so sensitive. The man can defend himself. He doesn't need you getting wrinkles over him."
Sitting with her at the kitchen table, I tap my fingers. "It's crowded here."
"Ungrateful already?"
I start to defend myself then realize she's teasing. "Flora and Perri need your help more than I do. You're saving them and giving their kids a chance. I wish my mom had known a woman like you. Things might have turned out a lot different."
"It's true that I'm a heroic figure," Darby says without missing a beat. "No arguing about that, but I worry about you and Pax living together. He's complicated."
Nodding, I think about Pax trying to make me jealous at breakfast. His eyes gave away his entire plan. I considered calling him out on it but let it go. I'd rather just tease him on not knowing women rather than get into a conversation about what might happen with us living in the same house.
"He has the most beautiful blue eyes," I say without thinking. When Darby gives me a disapproving look, I shrug. "He does."
"Yeah, he's plenty pretty. You're not wrong about his looks. Pax is more than pretty though. He's dangerous and selfish and immature. I say this as someone who likes him, but I like him as a friend. Not even a close friend, but someone who enjoys his company."
"That's all I am." Darby sighs in a way that makes me mad. "I'm not a child."
"You are young, Bebe. You've only had that one shithead lover. You wouldn't take me up on those offers to date a few nice guys. Now you're living with a man you're attracted to."
"I've seen him a lot the last few months."
"Now you'll see him every day. He'll look at you with those pretty eyes. He'll walk around shirtless, I'm sure. Pax will be nice to Lula. He'll buy you stuff. When he makes a move, you'll think it means more than it does. Oh, and the sex will be great. I've heard things, and Pax is enthusiastic," she says, giving me a wink.
We pause while the kids run through the kitchen and out the back door. Lula stops to look at me for permission. Once I nod, she's out the door.
"Maybe you'll tell yourself it doesn't matter," Darby continues. "It's just sex and you want to feel good. Why not have a little fun? Except sooner or later, he'll bring another girl around, and you'll feel like shit. You'll be jealous and pissed and start arguments with him. He'll throw a fit since he lacks the maturity to handle the situation like a man. He'll kick you out, and you'll feel worse since Lula will need to move again."
"Or maybe I can be smart enough not to sleep with him."
"Won't happen. Trust me. I'm speaking from experience," Darby says then leans back. "After Joker and I got divorced, we still had a lot of heat between us. We made a deal to have fun but not expect to get back together. Sounded great, and the sex felt great, but he was out dating for real. I couldn't have him back, but sharing him didn't interest me either. I got so jealous that I trashed one chick's car. I was out of control, but I blame Jenn. She was a bad influence back then because of her pregnancy hormones. She kept egging me on."
Darby waves her hand as if to erase the memories. "You can't play and not get attached. Pax can."
"Why couldn't you and Joker get back together if you still had all those feelings?"
"Don't change the subject. Joker and I are old news. You and Pax are not."
"Well I don't know what to do. Lula is already getting excited about having a princess room."
"Between you and me, I think the living situation isn't bad. He has a house too big for him. The top floor is just perfect for you and Lula. The yard is nice too. I always thought that house didn't make sense for two single men, but they liked it."
"So I should stay with him, but not have sex with him?"
"Oh, you'll have sex with him."
Frowning, I sag in the chair. "I don't get what you're telling me to do."
"I'm not sure either. I guess you should accept you can't keep Pax. You live there and you'll eventually sleep with him. You'll know he's gonna run the streets with other women, so you just decide to bite your tongue when those jealous feelings tell you to destroy a bitch's car."
Darby pours herself a fresh cup of coffee. "Don't worry about Jenn. She's done having kids, but Shay might be pregnant soon. That girl might be a hormonal troublemaker. Hard to tell. I was mellow when I was pregnant, while Jenn wanted to start fights. Lupe cleaned everyone's houses. Amanda was the best though. She got so paranoid that we tormented her constantly about people talking shit behind her back. I almost feel guilty for messing with her so much."
Darby doesn't look like she feels bad. In fact, she laughs before glancing out back at the kids.