A fissure of shock cleaved my heart. “Oh.”
Adrianna was the first to follow orders. Cai followed quickly, muttering something about a bath. Liora and Frazer hesitated, waiting for my say-so. “It’s fine,” I told them.
Liora’s mouth quivered in a hidden smile. Then, she dragged a very reluctant Frazer away.
Wilder was moving the second the door closed, crossing over to where I sat. Not to kiss or touch, but to kneel. Kneel before me. This proud, strong male was humbling himself. And I had no clue why.
I gaped. “What are you doing?”
“I swore that you’d be the last person I submitted to, and I meant it.”
I leaned into the back of the chair as he unsheathed a dagger from his hip.
He placed the curved blade across my thighs. An offering. “I need you to do something for me. Or rather, I need you to let me do something for you.”
Wilder held out his hands and put them on either side of my body. Complete surrender.
Emotion, hot and heady, stuck in my throat as the moment stretched, and he didn’t budge an inch. A tear slipped through my control. And then, another, and another. I hated every single one of them.
My hurt pride prevented me from speaking first.
He stared into me as if he’d guessed my thoughts. He wet his lips nervously and spoke in a rasp. “I’ve acted shamefully by ignoring you. My only excuse is that I mistook my age for wisdom. I thought by distancing myself, I’d save us both. You were right. I was a coward.”
He dipped his head a little, and added, “I didn’t lie to you though. When you resume your rightful place in court, no one will want us to be close. And things may change when you become fae, and if you meet your mate, he’ll fight for you. And maybe, he’ll win …”
The vulnerability in the line of his shoulders and jaw, in those low, rasping tones, almost made me reach for him. Almost.
A bolt, a thrill, passed through me as he continued. “The thing I know, right now, is that I don’t need a mating bond to tell me how I feel. And it won’t stop me from wanting to be near you—or from fighting by your side. So, no matter what happens to us, I want—no, I need to know that I have a place in your court. One so powerful that others can’t force or manipulate me into leaving.”
“What are you saying?” I forced out in a whisper.
“I want to fight for you, Serena … Smith? … Raynar?” he said, a smile playing on his mouth.
That beautiful, stupid mouth.
His expression slipped. More serious. More sincere. “So let me swear the guardian vow to you. It’s the only bond I can offer. The only service I can provide. I know I don’t deserve this, but if you’ll let me, if you’ll have me, I’ll pledge my sword and honor to your cause. Now and forever.”
The weight of those words left me scrambling and breathless. “You can’t. I can’t.”
He cut me short. “This isn’t a hasty choice on my part. I’ve thought about this. A lot. It’s the right thing to do. I know it is—trust me.”
There was nothing to say. I’d made one bond before without understanding the consequences, how could I do so again?
“Please, valo.”
It was so quiet, so soft. A plea that tugged.
Damn him.
Auntie? Any advice?
Trust your heart.
Double damn.
He looked so hopeful.
I’d surely burn in the dark court for agreeing. “I’ll only do it if you tell me what valo means.”
His eyes flared in surprise. Then his face split into a grin, broad and with a hint of mischief. Not breaking my stare, he took his dagger from my thighs and brought it sweeping across his wrist.
A little gasp escaped me as the blood beaded there.
He reached up slowly. My whole being narrowed to the point on my lips where he pressed his wrist. The metallic scent assaulted my nostrils, but I didn’t dare move.
A murmur. “It means light of the heavenly stars. The only thing that all fae kneel before.”
Then, a string of whispered Kaeli words bound us together. To honor, to protect, to cherish. Now and forever.
Chapter 31
The Bloody Battle
“Serena Smith, your opponent in this trial is Myla Peron,” Hilda announced.
The former leader of Cecile’s pack.
I didn’t need to scan the sand pit. Not with only nine of us left.
The crowd in the arena clapped politely as I walked over to join the female’s side. I kept a firm grip on my Utem?; anything to keep my hands steady.
Now, shoulder to shoulder with Myla, she gave me a little nod and a smile.
Damn.
I’d always liked Myla. It would’ve been so much easier to fight a hateful person.
Who cares how nice she is? Auntie spoke. You fight for your pack.
My pack. I searched for their faces.
Frazer and Cai had already been matched. Cai was standing, hand on longsword, next to Lucian, that spineless worm who’d ambushed Adrianna. Cai’s thunderous expression made it clear he remembered their last encounter well. By the wrath in Lucian’s red-eyed glower, it seemed he hadn’t forgotten either. He looked like a bitter frost. Like winter made flesh. My mind conjured up images mixed with fable from The Darkest Song, of a battle long ago, between the God of Ice and the God of Wind. In the legend, the latter had won. I prayed for the same outcome.
My eyes traveled to Frazer. Hot guilt seared my gut at the sight of the hulking body beside him. Another member from Tysion’s defunct pack. Who knew how much the twining had weakened my kin? Maybe I’d made him vulnerable to the likes of the giant winged fae, currently cracking his knuckles.
“Liora, you’re with Emilie Gretson.”
Hilda’s voice carried across the ring and my head immediately shifted to Liora. She was the closest to me. And even though she stood tall, her face paled underneath her freckles, and her fire-kissed features dimmed.
Adrianna was the last candidate to be paired off.
I felt Frazer hovering at the edge of my mind. There’s no one left.
One of the instructors? I suggested.
Hilda walked among us, shouting, “Due to our numbers, we’re left a recruit short. Adrianna Lakeshi cannot progress without facing an opponent; therefore, we’ve enacted the fifth trial clause. Cole Vysan has been granted a second chance.”
He stomped in via the portcullis. Unable to look at those monstrous, armored arms wielding steel, I roamed the stands searching for Wilder. He’d taken a seat near the barrier and was flanked by Dimitri and Mikael. It was too far to see his expression, but I no longer doubted him; I knew he’d be nervous for us—for me. Although we hadn’t rekindled our intimacy from the cave, our new bond had gone a long way to healing the fissure between us, and to melting my kin’s built-up resentment toward him.
Hilda bellowed, “Be aware, the same rules apply as in the fifth trial: land three hits and you win. No magic. No berserkers. The victor will stand by the ring edge until all other matches are concluded.” She paused as she walked to the outskirts of the ring to oversee. “Face your opponent, draw your weapons.”
My sword sighed as it came free.
“Prepare to engage!”
I dropped into a fighting stance, studying Myla’s movements. She looked calm, her pink wings tucked in tight. I guessed she’d seen my match against Jace and decided to play it safe.
Good. Fae suffered without proper wing mobility. She’d be slower and clumsier.
“Begin!”
Myla prowled, circling me, forcing me to mirror her. She moved carefully, her whole body adjusting to the tiniest movement on my part.
You’re letting her dictate the terms. Do something, Auntie urged.
“Like what?” I mumbled aloud.
Myla’s head angled; she must think me mad.
SUN! Auntie yelled.
I had a panic-stricken second to realize my mistake, to raise my defenses. Manipulated into the sun’s path and blinded, my only warning to where her attack was coming from was sand crunching underfoot. I moved, lurching back, whirling left.
Every action felt disjointed, separate from my will.